Back and it Feels SO GOOD.

I'M BAAAAAAAACK!!!

I really missed having this outlet for my thoughts. My husband isn't overly thrilled (or, he won't be when he sees this...) but I'm determined to be a little less vulnerable, a little less revealing, and a little less bitchy. I'm sure he will be pleased by this.

In the 2.5 months since I last blogged, a lot has happened. I started my job (which will remained unnamed, but rest assured it is not at a place called The Outhouse, The Playhouse, or an unmarked building). I love my job. I'm told that I am good at my job. I love my coworkers, I love the industry I'm working in (which is NOT the sex-trade industry), I love the 8-5 and I just love being a working mother. I can honestly say that in my situation - and only my situation, so I hope no stay-at-home moms get their panties in a wad - being a working mom is 150 times easier than being a full-time stay at home mom. Maybe it's just my personality type, but I crave interaction with people who don't consistently shit their pants. I also feel like it makes the time I spend with Collins so much more fun and meaningful. Homegirl can PLAY. I so cherish the evening hours and the Saturday/Sunday mornings. I think she appreciates the time spent with her friends, too!

Um let's see what else?


Oh, um, our house is completely torn up. I would post pictures butttttttt my camera is like, way across the room. And I don't crave public humilation. Basically, Superman I mean husband and I (yes I am partially to blame for this) decided to redo our flooring throughout the house, minus the basement because that carpet is totes fine. White brown carpet just wasn't gonna work.
It looked gross, it constantly looked dirty no matter what we did, and honestly, who wants an entire houseful of carpet? Ron Jeremy?

Well, I'm not Ron Jeremy, and we were sick of it. So we had the bedrooms recarpeted and they are glooooooooooooooorious. Beautiful Stainmaster frieze, it will prove to be a great investment.

What about everywhere else, you might ask, if you are bored to death with everything else going on the world and happen to be reading this meaningless drivel?

We are installing wood flooring throughout. And yes I did say we. And I meant we. Because we are cheap and resourceful. And consequently, because we are also effing stupid. This has been the most unbelieveably frustrating, aggravating, and overall pain-in-the-ass home improvement experience I think I have ever had, or will have. Actually, no, it IS the most awful experience I ever will have had, because I will NEVER DO IT AGAIN.

Friday night was spent doing it incorrectly. For three hours. Sounds like my prom night
Okay, I think that's what Manchild was talking about when he told me I needed to clean it up. That's what she said.
I don't even want to get into how it was wrong, let's just leave it at, "Well the directions said to do it this way, but I decided to try doing it this way instead." Hmm...well I'm no engineer, but I'm pretty sure that we just wasted FIVE EFFING HOURS by not doing it the way the directions instruct.

There were tears.


But once I dried his tears, we decided to sleep on it, recharge our batteries and try again in the morning. We he worked throughout the day while I watched the wild thing, trying to keep her out of the way from dangerous tools, saws, etc. I felt bad not being able to help more, but we weren't intelligent enough to think "Hey might want to get a sitter." More progress was made today, until we decided (maybe one third of the way done) to take a little breakey-poo and go buy the appropriate moldings that we measured.

Go to the place, ask about the moldings. They don't carry our particular color that matches our flooring, we have to have it special ordered. Wtf. Baby needs a nap, mommy needs a drink, and daddy needs a medal for putting up with two pissed off girls, both of whom have pretty severe attitudes and can throw the kind of tantrums that offend bystanders. Needless to say, we arrived home empty-handed, save for the early-onset Type 2 Diabetes we picked up from Little Caesar's.



Have you ever been such a freakin stress ball that you binge eat, and it almost makes you feel high? Welp, I have. About 90 minutes ago, in fact. I took down three pieces of pizza and a crazy bread stick, and now I'm coming down off my high. I have the shakes. I almost forgot about why I am so stressed out, until I came to and saw the mess I am surrounded by.

Point is, if anyone is thinking about installing a houseful of flooring by themselves, reread this. This description is about twenty times more mild and gentle than how I'm really feeling. It's just that the four-letter words streaming through my head may read as slightly aggressive. Let's put it this way: If husband hadn't unplugged the oven and moved it, my head would be in it.

Another thing that's changed lately is my choice of reading material. Wild Thing likes to pull apart my magazines, so my stock of magazine reading is decidedly low. Instead I have been reading a lot of blogs. Awesome, fabulous blogs. A lot of Mormons. A lot of rich Mormons. Rachel from The Pink Peonies - I mean could she be any cuter? Lilly's Style, Living In Yellow, Penny Pincher Fashion, Running On Happiness, The Daily Tay (obvs), BLoved, The Possessionista and My Lovely Surroundings are all my daily-reads (do I like, need a menu bar or something for that?) How much confidence does it take to willingly have daily photographs taken of yourself, modeling your fashion of the day? I would kill for confidence like that, instead of diving headfirst out of the picture. The fashion ones are aiding a J Crew habit that needs to check itself before it wrecks my credit. For reals. Just kidding. But seriously though. What does a girl gotta do to dress in head-to-toe Crew, am I right? Plus, I have very little absolutely no fashion sense whatsoever, so those blogs have helped me a ton - especially helpful now that I'm working and I don't live in my fartpants. My fartpants are my gray, oversized Theta sweatpants that Clayton nicknamed (I swear it wasn't me, I don't fart). They are so big and baggy that if I have my cell phone in my pocket, my pants fall down. No, I do not have a Zack Morris phone. But I wish I did.



Feels good to be back. You should also "like" me. Or "favorite" me...or follow me or whatever. Because according to my Stats page, I highly doubt that my measley (but wonderful and appreciated) 16 followers could have racked up over 10,000 hits...I'm just sayin.